I like to think of myself
as a slightly humorous person. I’d like to think that my writing and videos
accurately reflect that. In honour of how funny I am, today’s post is going to
be a list of my top 7 (I’m just being too lazy to find links for the times I
was funny in videos) funniest moments (plus I’ll explain why the jokes are
funny; always the best part!)!
7: The time I made
Spongebob joke
I’m gonna be honest with y’all: I have never watched
an episode of Spongebob 4x90°pants
in my life. And yes, that math joke took way longer to write out than it
should’ve, but that isn’t the joke this entry is about! That’s right; this
article is going to be funnier than the time that Patrick burnt down the whole
time in a fit of coke-fueled rage. Again, I’ve never watched the show, I’m just
assuming that happened at some point or another.
Here’s the real deal though:
Mixing classic tumblr
style humour with the playful antics of Spongebob, truly I am a saint.
6: The time Ramsay Bolton nee Snow liked my tweet:
If
you’ve known me for any amount of time, or looked at my twitter feed on a
Sunday night, you’ll know one fact about me: I somewhat enjoy the global
pasttime that is Game of Thrones. And by somewhat enjoy, I mean that I can
discuss the fan theories like a pro, and debate whether or not the interest
charged by the Iron Bank of Braavos is fair or not.
Without
spoiling too much, Ramsay was not a delightful person. He did however love his
dogs and kept them well fed—by feeding them people. He killed, maimed, and
raped often. And he tried to kill fan favourite Jon Snow. Just an all around
bad guy. He was even more hated than Joffery, by some fans.
And
then the actor, Iwan Rheon, got cast as Hitler in a production about Hitler’s
time as an artist. Everyone was making jokes about this, so of course I jumped
right on the ol’ bandwagon!
Bonus points for my
awesome profile pic.
5. The time I made fun of
Kylo Ren:
Another thing you’ll know about me, is that I am a
huge nerd. Especially when it comes to science fiction. Now, as a disclaimer,
Star Trek is better than Star Wars, but this joke is all about Star Wars.
When we first saw Kylo Ren’s lightsaber, we all had a
good long laugh about it. Cross guards made out of lasers on a laser sword?
LOLK. After watching the film, we all felt a little stupid for making fun of
the lightsaber, because we found out there was so much more to make fun of than
just that. Honestly, the saber is like the least funny thing about Kylo Ren.
Unfortunately, this joke went for the low-hanging fruit that was the
lightsaber.
I mean, it was still a
pretty solid joke. Hopefully Disney didn’t take it too seriously though.
4. The time it got a
little too real:
I write a lot about sexuality and gender identity.
It’s something that is important to me, and to the entire world. Representation
is something that is needed, and is crucial in showing the queer community that
there is nothing wrong with them.
Unfortunately, straight people still think that being
straight is the best, and that remembering other things exist is just far too
much work. After all, wearing khaki and golfing takes all their energy. Plus,
who’s going to watch all the Adam Sandler movies? Too much? Oh well.
One time, a friend forgot that I wasn’t straight.
Moments after I had sent a link to a video chronicling my coming out story. But
don’t worry! She had a valid excuse, and I had an even more valid retort:
Ah, the causal sarcasm as
I threw her words back at her. While this may not be the funniest thing I’ve
said, it’s one of the things I am most proud of. Straight people, am I right?
3. Just to lighten things
up, the time I made fun of my sister’s texting:
Millennials, the laziest group of people to ever
exist, right baby boomers? Them and their texting and activism, don’t they know
that they should just be cynical and work jobs that they hate so they can buy
houses in a market that your generation wrecked? God. Anyways, millennials love
to text! I can confirm this because I am sending 243 texts right now! As I
type! Amazing!
Kat, as she describes herself, is a basic bitch. A
white girl. And texts like one af. As evidenced by this short and sweet
exchange of ours:
I apologize for the
appalling language. Everyone knows I only swear while playing Mario Kart and
Halo. Blue shells and lag, my language kryptonite.
2: A topical Pokémon Go
joke!
No article these days is complete without at least
one PKGo (as the cool kids call it) joke or reference. And by all ‘eevee’dence,
I sure am up on the trends. I’d be a piece of ‘trubbish’ if I didn’t squeeze in
a few Poképuns. Honestly, I could just start using tree puns, and everyone
would think I was making clever jokes about the professors in the franchise.
My joke might be a ‘jolteon’ the old system, but I
think if I put the ol’ ‘charmeleon’, you’ll enjoy it! Okay, I’m done, here’s
the original joke. All 151 of em:
Those Poképuns hurt my
brain.
1. The time I made an
inappropriate joke:
Sorry mom and dad, sometimes I do make some
inappropriate jokes. And sometimes they are hilarious! Other times, they came
out during Cards against Humanity, and left me feeling bad. This is not one of
those times!
The final joke contains no pop culture, no vulgar
language, and no funny pictures. Just words. Please, enjoy:
So good. So pure. So
funny.
