Dear Readers,
I suppose this is a like a Holiday letter of sorts, although I'm not actually sure how those work... Not really a thing my family has ever done. It has been an inappropriately long time since I last posted anything here (January 3rd, 2018). It has not been for a lack of trying, however it has been for a lack of... myself.
This past year has been a trying one, and an exalting one. January saw me at the lowest I've been in an extremely long time, while months later had me at one of my highest highs. Writing this is hard, not because of the subject matter, merely because I have not exercised these muscles in some time, and forming the sentences is literally a struggle. I hate this, but it's my own fault.
I said this was a Holiday letter! I'm pretty sure people usually write these by dividing the letter into monthly sections? Sure.
January:
January was bad. Like I said earlier, January saw me at one of my lowest points. I have been open in the past about my mental health issues, and the struggles that come with. I am bad at being open with my depression, and even worse at dealing with it. Well, January saw me check myself into the local hospital on a suicide watch. It was an exhausting time, to put it mildly. Much of the following weeks and months were a dull blur due to the new medications that I was on. A convenient excuse for not writing!--if I were looking for one. There was a bright spot at the end of January, my roommate Bethany invited one of her co-workers over for some Dungeons and Dragons. Her name was Ashton, and she was (and is) radiant.
February:
My birth month has been historically a bad one for my mental health, but luckily for me there was no way it was going to be worse than January. Bethany surprised me by inviting several friends over, and getting a nice big ice cream cake for my birthday. Ashton, and her brother (who was also now playing dnd with us) were there as well. By this time, Ashton and I were messaging each other constantly, and we were both hoping to become more than friends. I had planned to ask her out to Black Panther as our first date, but because of the medication I was still getting used to, I wasn't comfortable driving, so it ended up being more of a group thing, than a romantic date. We still had a great time though. The pub we went to for supper after the movie was hosting Disney Trivia that night. We do consider this to be our first date, but it wasn't officially anything?
March:
This was the month we officially started dating according to our friends and families. I don't remember too much else about March. I know that this was the month I stopped going to counselling, which was stupid of me. We went to my parents at the end of the month for Easter. Ashton and my parents hit it off quickly, with my mom showing her all the embarrassing childhood pictures.
April:
April started with archery, a skill I used to teach at summer camps. We all went out to our friend Andrew's farm and shot arrows for a few hours. There was still snow on the ground, but the air was starting to warm up, and it felt really good to get outside and do something like that. April also included Ashton and I going to pretty much my favourite restaurant in the province: DeJa Vu Cafe, a chicken joint in Moose Jaw. April also included the release of Infinity War, which ended up being a very emotional date for the both of us.
May:
May marked our first out of province trip as a couple: unfortunately it was to Edmonton to visit her uncle in the hospital (he recovered, and is fine now). While the circumstances around the trip were not exactly the greatest, the trip was still nice, and did provide a nice escape from our every day. And, randomly, my adopted sister Katrina was in Edmonton at the same time, so we had a nice meal out with her. May was always when we began talking about moving in together.
June:
June was the month we moved in together, officially, although if I'm being honest, we had basically been living together for a while at that point. June also marked the beginning of Summer! My favourite season in Canada. I love the outdoors and swimming. I began to drag Ashton out to the local lake as often as I could. We took some amazing photos over the summer at that lake.
July:
July marked the first time we spent significant, well, time apart from each other. I did not like it. That's all I'm going to say about the time apart. Picking her up at the airport felt amazing though, it was hard not to cry when I saw her walk through the gate.
August:
I don't know exactly when I knew that I was going to propose to Ashton, I do know that it was ridiculously early in our relationship (especially since in August our relationship was only 6 months in). On August 4th, I asked Ashton to marry me; she said yes. And as she is currently sitting beside me working on her art, I'm pretty sure she meant it. August, and July before it, had a lot of time spent with friends and at the lake, soaking in as much of the summer heat as possible. August also saw the introduction of Jack-O, an orange tabby that was an engagement present from her parents.
September:
In September, Doug Jones (Star Trek: Discovery, Hellboy, The Shape of Water) touched my beard and it was amazing. I'm fairly certain some other stuff happened in September as well, but that's all I can remember right now.
October:
Our first Halloween. A big one. Turned out, Halloween was super important to both of us. I went as one of my DnD characters, and Ashton went as Hawkgirl. We ended up spending the day in the city with Andrew and his girlfriend, Marin. It was really nice; Ashton and Marin got to go trick or treating (only one house told them that they were too old), and we all got to spend some stress-free bonding time together. Plus we saw a car decked out like Ecto-1, the Ghostbusters' car.
November:
Oddly enough, November is the month I'm having the hardest time recalling. Like, I know stuff happened? Maybe? I don't actually know. Ashton's 28th birthday happened, which I tried my hardest to make as special as possible. Her favourite food is spaghetti, so I made a sauce from scratch, and baked her a french vanilla cake with a maple frosting. We had a bunch of our friends over, hung out and played dnd. It was a good night, one which I hope to top next year.
December:
Well, December is now, so I can't say too much about it yet.
That's it, a whole year distilled into a short letter. A year that began terribly, but ended up being one of the best.
Happy Holidays everyone!
Much love,
I suppose this is a like a Holiday letter of sorts, although I'm not actually sure how those work... Not really a thing my family has ever done. It has been an inappropriately long time since I last posted anything here (January 3rd, 2018). It has not been for a lack of trying, however it has been for a lack of... myself.
This past year has been a trying one, and an exalting one. January saw me at the lowest I've been in an extremely long time, while months later had me at one of my highest highs. Writing this is hard, not because of the subject matter, merely because I have not exercised these muscles in some time, and forming the sentences is literally a struggle. I hate this, but it's my own fault.
I said this was a Holiday letter! I'm pretty sure people usually write these by dividing the letter into monthly sections? Sure.
January:
January was bad. Like I said earlier, January saw me at one of my lowest points. I have been open in the past about my mental health issues, and the struggles that come with. I am bad at being open with my depression, and even worse at dealing with it. Well, January saw me check myself into the local hospital on a suicide watch. It was an exhausting time, to put it mildly. Much of the following weeks and months were a dull blur due to the new medications that I was on. A convenient excuse for not writing!--if I were looking for one. There was a bright spot at the end of January, my roommate Bethany invited one of her co-workers over for some Dungeons and Dragons. Her name was Ashton, and she was (and is) radiant.
February:
My birth month has been historically a bad one for my mental health, but luckily for me there was no way it was going to be worse than January. Bethany surprised me by inviting several friends over, and getting a nice big ice cream cake for my birthday. Ashton, and her brother (who was also now playing dnd with us) were there as well. By this time, Ashton and I were messaging each other constantly, and we were both hoping to become more than friends. I had planned to ask her out to Black Panther as our first date, but because of the medication I was still getting used to, I wasn't comfortable driving, so it ended up being more of a group thing, than a romantic date. We still had a great time though. The pub we went to for supper after the movie was hosting Disney Trivia that night. We do consider this to be our first date, but it wasn't officially anything?
March:
This was the month we officially started dating according to our friends and families. I don't remember too much else about March. I know that this was the month I stopped going to counselling, which was stupid of me. We went to my parents at the end of the month for Easter. Ashton and my parents hit it off quickly, with my mom showing her all the embarrassing childhood pictures.
April:
April started with archery, a skill I used to teach at summer camps. We all went out to our friend Andrew's farm and shot arrows for a few hours. There was still snow on the ground, but the air was starting to warm up, and it felt really good to get outside and do something like that. April also included Ashton and I going to pretty much my favourite restaurant in the province: DeJa Vu Cafe, a chicken joint in Moose Jaw. April also included the release of Infinity War, which ended up being a very emotional date for the both of us.
May:
May marked our first out of province trip as a couple: unfortunately it was to Edmonton to visit her uncle in the hospital (he recovered, and is fine now). While the circumstances around the trip were not exactly the greatest, the trip was still nice, and did provide a nice escape from our every day. And, randomly, my adopted sister Katrina was in Edmonton at the same time, so we had a nice meal out with her. May was always when we began talking about moving in together.
June:
June was the month we moved in together, officially, although if I'm being honest, we had basically been living together for a while at that point. June also marked the beginning of Summer! My favourite season in Canada. I love the outdoors and swimming. I began to drag Ashton out to the local lake as often as I could. We took some amazing photos over the summer at that lake.
July:
July marked the first time we spent significant, well, time apart from each other. I did not like it. That's all I'm going to say about the time apart. Picking her up at the airport felt amazing though, it was hard not to cry when I saw her walk through the gate.
August:
I don't know exactly when I knew that I was going to propose to Ashton, I do know that it was ridiculously early in our relationship (especially since in August our relationship was only 6 months in). On August 4th, I asked Ashton to marry me; she said yes. And as she is currently sitting beside me working on her art, I'm pretty sure she meant it. August, and July before it, had a lot of time spent with friends and at the lake, soaking in as much of the summer heat as possible. August also saw the introduction of Jack-O, an orange tabby that was an engagement present from her parents.
September:
In September, Doug Jones (Star Trek: Discovery, Hellboy, The Shape of Water) touched my beard and it was amazing. I'm fairly certain some other stuff happened in September as well, but that's all I can remember right now.
October:
Our first Halloween. A big one. Turned out, Halloween was super important to both of us. I went as one of my DnD characters, and Ashton went as Hawkgirl. We ended up spending the day in the city with Andrew and his girlfriend, Marin. It was really nice; Ashton and Marin got to go trick or treating (only one house told them that they were too old), and we all got to spend some stress-free bonding time together. Plus we saw a car decked out like Ecto-1, the Ghostbusters' car.
November:
Oddly enough, November is the month I'm having the hardest time recalling. Like, I know stuff happened? Maybe? I don't actually know. Ashton's 28th birthday happened, which I tried my hardest to make as special as possible. Her favourite food is spaghetti, so I made a sauce from scratch, and baked her a french vanilla cake with a maple frosting. We had a bunch of our friends over, hung out and played dnd. It was a good night, one which I hope to top next year.
December:
Well, December is now, so I can't say too much about it yet.
That's it, a whole year distilled into a short letter. A year that began terribly, but ended up being one of the best.
Happy Holidays everyone!
Much love,
