Family don't end with blood, boy

                Family is a common theme in many narratives. It’s something that is easy to do and always evokes some sort of reaction from the audience. But what exactly is family? Does family only count those of blood relation, or does it extend passed that? The answer to that isn’t exactly clear, and if you look at pop culture the answer seems mixed. Personally, I believe that family, your real family, are the people you choose.

                In Supernatural, the importance of family is put front and centre in the very first episode (a whole 240 episodes ago) when Dean reunites with his brother Sam to go find their missing father, all the while hunting the demon that killed their mother. Family is kind of a big deal in Supernatural. But as the seasons progress, so does the idea of family. While at the beginning family literally meant blood relations, it soon came to include Bobby (who became a surrogate father to the boys), Ellen (a surrogate mother), Jo, Charlie, Cas (an angel), Kevin (a prophet), Chuck (a writer, and (SPOILER) God), and even Crowley (a demon). The following is one of the most quoted exchanges on the show:

Dean: This isn't your fight.

Bobby: The hell it isn't! Family don't end with blood, boy.

The fandom has taken this and turned it into a way of life. The official name for the fandom is the Supernatural family.

                Bobby’s quote resonated with a lot of people, including myself. Biologically speaking, my family is fairly small, and we’re pretty spread out. Never mind that half of the family doesn’t speak to each other. I always wanted a big family, I wanted to know that there were a ton of people out there who loved me and cared for me, so I made my own. Because family doesn’t end in blood, family is everyone that cares about you.

                A favourite saying of people who think family is blood relations is the old adage: “Blood is thicker than water!” And while that statement has merits, it has been having a rough history as of late. A Rabbi has come forward and said that the original phrase was closer to: “The blood of the covenant is thicker than the waters of the womb.” It’s a statement I personally agree with, however when one does a rudimentary search of the phrase, there is no source of the statement before this Rabbi. Maybe that was the original, maybe this Rabbi has a sense of humour, it’s hard to say and harder to prove. This whole paragraph is basically pointless other than to answer the question of why I didn’t use this quote pre-emptively.

                How I Met Your Mother really took the idea of choosing your family and ran with it. None of the main characters are related by blood, but they were one of the closest families in television history. You knew that they loved each other unconditionally. You knew that they would always have each other’s backs, even when they were fighting. This idea that your friend group could become your family has been instrumental in my own understanding of the concept.

                Family is important. Outside of nourishment and shelter, it’s arguably the most important aspect of a person’s life. The idea that our family is a group of people forced on us by simple genetics is ridiculous. Family is not a title that is given out by right of birth, family is a title that is earned and fought for. A friend—family member!—and I were talking about this the other day, and summed up my beliefs thusly: “Way I see it, you got blood relations, and you got family. Sometimes the blood relations don’t get to be family.”

                When I think of my own family, there are very few blood relations that I would consider to be part of my real family, and I’m not meaning any disrespect towards them, they just aren’t an influential part of my day-to-day existence.  I still consider them family, just not family. Obviously, my parents are part of those I consider to be my true family, and the rest of you know who you are (hopefully).

                Literally a quarter of this was just me talking about Supernatural, and honestly I had to rein myself in. Other pop culture I was going to touch on: Harry Potter, Arrow, Doctor Who and Torchwood, Star Trek, Battlestar Galactica (2004), Frodo and Sam (Lord of the Rings for you heathens), Guardians of the Galaxy (Peter Quill and literally everyone), Orphan Black, KillJoys, Dark Matter, Chuck, Stargate SG-1 and Atlantis, and The Expanse. Know what I wasn’t going to talk about? Friends. Those people were not a family (other than Joey and Chandler). 

Global Family

     I am so behind on these posts omg. I am so sorry. Honest.
     I do have a topic today, it was inspired by a comment a friend of mine made last weekend. I had a quick phone call from a friend of mine from New Mexico (which I forgot, and said she was Cali (sorry)), and after the call another friend asked me why I talk to people all over the place. It's a valid question, and I'm going to go into it here.
     I have friends all over the globe: US, Norway, UK, South Africa, UAE (mostly in Dubai), Australia, Italy, and scattered over other places in Europe. I talk to most of those people on a daily basis. We're important to each other, and have a role in each other's lives. Can be as simple as just a check-in to deep conversations about life to offering encouragement during the dark and confusing times.
      But that doesn't answer the core part of that question. Why do I have friends in other countries? We live in a world where we can instantly connect with people thousands of kilometers (sorry, miles) away. It is amazing and something that should be taken advantage of! And contrary to what some think, being connected to these people through digital means does not take away from the relationships we have with those geographically close to us. We live in a world filled with opportunities, anything we want to do, to create, we can. But it takes connections, it takes networking. I used to hate that thought. I hated that I had to know people to get things done, but now I see it as something beautiful. Networking and connections don't have to be impersonal. You can be friends with the people in your "network", and when they're your friends they aren't just a network of people anymore. You've made your network something more. You've made it into a family that wants to help you, instead of just a list of people you can try to ask for things.
      In the past to be successful you had to be well-liked and respected (or feared if you're a dick) in a certain radius, but now you can successful all-over the globe, and have your next door neighbour not even know your name. We live in this strange paradigm where millions of people know who you are, where you can be a household name in Europe, but in your home country people from the next town over haven't even heard of you.
      This makes it sounds like I talk to all these people out of selfishness, but that's not true. I started talking to all these people for reasons that basically boil down to the fact that I wanted more friends. I didn't want a network, or connections, I wanted a more global family. Everywhere we look these days we see hate. And that makes me so sad, and in my attempt to be a more global citizen I've made friends all over the globe. Could these relationships benefit me in a more businesslike manner in the future? Yes. Is that what they're for? Hell no.
      I guess the basic answer is simply because I want to. I want to have friends in other countries. I want a global family.
      And now I have one. And if any of you are reading this, and you should be, I love each and everyone of you. Even if I haven't said it directly. Thank you for your encouragements, and for being there for me. You are all amazing and wonderful people.