I've written about this subject before, but it continues to come up! Like, honestly people, I've talked about how ridiculous it all is already. It should be gone! I, as a lazy and entitled millennial, have spoken up! Why didn't all you olds listen to me? All this threw me into such a fuss I almost put soy milk into my latte this morning instead of almond milk. IKR?
As a spokesperson for my generation, though tbh we are all spokepeople of our generation, I gotta say (from the comfort of my vintage armchair!), you guys kinda left the world in a bad place. It was like you were in an abusive relationship with the Earth, then broke up with it. But didn't leave! And now, while we're trying to clean up the place and offer some love and support, you're literally just shitting on the floor. Now, I know, you worked hard for the home you have (that cost a fraction of what housing does these days, even after inflation), and you feel like you've earned the right to dictate how things should get done. You've got all those years of experience on how to be sexist, racist, and elitist, and you feel like we should be emulating the example your putting forth instead of downloading emulators to play Mario. And to be 100% for real with you, we are learning from your example! You're a great teacher! We are learning, from your wonderful and timely examples, how not to live. We see the lessons you're putting forth and we are understanding. Thank you so much for showing us what not to do! I'm sure it is taking a lot out of you everyday pretending to be an asshole. And we sincerely and humbly thank you for this great sacrifice!
We are taking these great lessons and putting them into action! We see you "complaining" about those "different folks", and we understand that what you really want is for us to help people! Because we're all people! There are no "different folks", just folks who like different things! Your false bigotry has really shown us how terrible it is! Your lessons have really shown us terrible the world could be if people actually thought the way you pretend to!
It is in that vein, that I must apologize for those in my generation who seemingly think your teachings show how to act, instead of the opposite. I know, I'm sure you thought it was so obvious! How could a decent human being ever actually act the way you pretend to! And yet, for some your lessons have failed. They have become the racist bigots you have so valiantly fought against!
Your generation has so wonderfully shown us just how bad fossil fuels are to the environment, you've shown us to be careful with our water supply, you've shown us that war is bad, you've shown us countless times how pathetic and harmful racism is, and you've shown us that being true to ourselves is something we should be ashamed of (unless we're white, male, and straight! That's some shit to be proud of!). Thanks to your wonderful lessons I lied to myself for 25 years. Thanks to your lessons I learned to sit quietly by as bad things happened (it's the will of god after all (sorry, my God gave us freewill hoping that we wouldn't fuck up (oops)), so why bother?) because "one person can't make a difference". In a way that was right, one person can't make a difference to the whole world by themselves, but one person can encourage others to stand up. One person can start a movement that changes the world. You see us as mindless drones attached to our "gadgets", who are oblivious to the things around us. You are so wrong. We see the world. We see how messed up it is. We are trying to make things better. Whether it's cheaper education, or medication that is more freely available, or it's standing up against injustice through social media and writing. We are fighting this war that you forgot about. You grew complacent with the corruption in the system until the system became corruption. You let the world fall to pieces. We're just trying to pick up those pieces. Instead of helping though, you call us entitled when we say that education has gotten too expensive. You call us lazy when you hear about people living off welfare, but you don't see that there are no jobs. You call us freaks when we support gender issues, but you don't understand the problems.
God forbid that you try and understand though. God forbid that you try and change to be a better person. God forbid you admit that maybe you guys messed up a little. I know, it's far easier to just blame the next generation. "Kids these days, they just don't understand how hard it was." You know what? You don't understand how hard it is now.
As the lazy entitled millennial you are probably imagining me to be, I just want to say, as I quickly look up from my cell phone (lol social media, right?), in a mumbling voice: "thanks, or whatever."
I wanted to end this with either a Douglas Adams quote, or by saying "fuck off", but I decided against both. So long. Thanks for killing the fish.
As a spokesperson for my generation, though tbh we are all spokepeople of our generation, I gotta say (from the comfort of my vintage armchair!), you guys kinda left the world in a bad place. It was like you were in an abusive relationship with the Earth, then broke up with it. But didn't leave! And now, while we're trying to clean up the place and offer some love and support, you're literally just shitting on the floor. Now, I know, you worked hard for the home you have (that cost a fraction of what housing does these days, even after inflation), and you feel like you've earned the right to dictate how things should get done. You've got all those years of experience on how to be sexist, racist, and elitist, and you feel like we should be emulating the example your putting forth instead of downloading emulators to play Mario. And to be 100% for real with you, we are learning from your example! You're a great teacher! We are learning, from your wonderful and timely examples, how not to live. We see the lessons you're putting forth and we are understanding. Thank you so much for showing us what not to do! I'm sure it is taking a lot out of you everyday pretending to be an asshole. And we sincerely and humbly thank you for this great sacrifice!
We are taking these great lessons and putting them into action! We see you "complaining" about those "different folks", and we understand that what you really want is for us to help people! Because we're all people! There are no "different folks", just folks who like different things! Your false bigotry has really shown us how terrible it is! Your lessons have really shown us terrible the world could be if people actually thought the way you pretend to!
It is in that vein, that I must apologize for those in my generation who seemingly think your teachings show how to act, instead of the opposite. I know, I'm sure you thought it was so obvious! How could a decent human being ever actually act the way you pretend to! And yet, for some your lessons have failed. They have become the racist bigots you have so valiantly fought against!
Your generation has so wonderfully shown us just how bad fossil fuels are to the environment, you've shown us to be careful with our water supply, you've shown us that war is bad, you've shown us countless times how pathetic and harmful racism is, and you've shown us that being true to ourselves is something we should be ashamed of (unless we're white, male, and straight! That's some shit to be proud of!). Thanks to your wonderful lessons I lied to myself for 25 years. Thanks to your lessons I learned to sit quietly by as bad things happened (it's the will of god after all (sorry, my God gave us freewill hoping that we wouldn't fuck up (oops)), so why bother?) because "one person can't make a difference". In a way that was right, one person can't make a difference to the whole world by themselves, but one person can encourage others to stand up. One person can start a movement that changes the world. You see us as mindless drones attached to our "gadgets", who are oblivious to the things around us. You are so wrong. We see the world. We see how messed up it is. We are trying to make things better. Whether it's cheaper education, or medication that is more freely available, or it's standing up against injustice through social media and writing. We are fighting this war that you forgot about. You grew complacent with the corruption in the system until the system became corruption. You let the world fall to pieces. We're just trying to pick up those pieces. Instead of helping though, you call us entitled when we say that education has gotten too expensive. You call us lazy when you hear about people living off welfare, but you don't see that there are no jobs. You call us freaks when we support gender issues, but you don't understand the problems.
God forbid that you try and understand though. God forbid that you try and change to be a better person. God forbid you admit that maybe you guys messed up a little. I know, it's far easier to just blame the next generation. "Kids these days, they just don't understand how hard it was." You know what? You don't understand how hard it is now.
As the lazy entitled millennial you are probably imagining me to be, I just want to say, as I quickly look up from my cell phone (lol social media, right?), in a mumbling voice: "thanks, or whatever."
I wanted to end this with either a Douglas Adams quote, or by saying "fuck off", but I decided against both. So long. Thanks for killing the fish.
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